Thursday, February 19, 2009

Is it Friday yet?

As most of you have already noticed, this is the first post of the day. It turned out to be quite a stressful morning that included mommy having a meltdown. When it rains it pours I guess. Why do things break or stop working when it's the worst timing? Why do my coping skills go down the toilet when things stop working? Our dryer decided to stop producing heat last week and our laptop, that I use to work from the hospital and faithfully post on the blog, wouldn't boot up this morning. I've been holding up pretty well this week but the computer pooping out just pushed me over the edge into a sobbing mess.

Cat got the lucky phone call from me this morning. This isn't the first time she's gotten a call like this or seen me walk into her office in tears. I've known Cat for almost 2 years, although it seems like much longer, and she's been my rock. I really do believe that God places people in your life for a reason and he knew I would need her to lean on. My life has transitioned and changed so much in the short time I've known Cat. My dad passed away shortly after I met her and about 3 months later I became pregnant with Alex. It was a tough year dealing with the loss of my dad, finding out that our child had spina bifida and helping care for my grandmother who has severe dementia. Cat has been a best friend to me and has been there for me on a daily basis through the difficult times and has helped me to celebrate the good times. Today, after my desperate phone call, she managed to check out a laptop for me at work, get it set up so I could work from the hospital and drive to Children's to drop it off and bring me lunch. That's how amazing she is and I don't know what I'd do without her. I would post a pic of us if I had my computer :) We are so blessed to have so many great friends and a loving family to share life with.

Since this is Alex's blog, you probably want to hear an update on her. Good thing I had an interesting morning because not much has changed since we left last night. She's still needing round the clock care to manage her secretions and keep the pressure in her lungs down. Still waiting for her to turn the corner and start getting better. When I finally arrived to see her, everything fell into place and I was at peace. She looked like an angel lying there so peaceful.
Thanks for all the great posts over the last 24 hours. It was so nice to hear from so many and know you are following our journey. Please keep praying for us and we'll keep you posted.


Suzie W. said...

I'm sorry you're having a rough day. I'm praying for Alex and your family. It is so hard to see our babies not acting like themselves and my heart goes out to you. We're in Denver with Grant, seeing his urologist. I will let you know if we make it to Children's.
Suzie (mommy to Grant from Baby Center SB board)

Jimmy said... looks like I've been demoted from my position of Nicole's "rock."

I guess this means Cat will get ALL the sobbing phone calls from now on?


Anonymous said...

Hang in there! I think it's actually good to have a breakdown b/c it's important to let your heart, mind, & body have a small sense of release & it is in this most vulnerable state that we let God, family, friends in just a tiny bit more & they help cary the load :) Know that from an outsider's perspective you exude strength!
Lauren @MOC

Cat said...

uh oh...I didn't know I was signing up for THAT! =)


Anonymous said...

Lots of hugs for you Nic. You are stronger than you know. And yes everyone needs a meltdown at times. It's not a sign of weakness, it's a sign we are all human and need to release pent up emotions and feelings. When it rains it pours, so the sun should start shining for you really soon.
Nana Carol

Anonymous said...

Glad you're feeling better sis! Just remember, when you're at the bottom there's no place to go but up. Thank's to Cat for taking care of our sweet Nicole. And as for Jimmy, we've got plenty of issues around here if you're feeling a little left out just give us a call. But seriously, we do love and miss you all...
Jody, Cilla & Sadie-Bug

Nic said...

sometimes you need two rocks....don't worry, you are still my ball and chain baby:)

by the way, you didn't seem too sad to hear that Cat got "the call" earlier, did ya?

The Andersons said...

Just connecting and letting you know that we are thinking about you and praying for you, as well as the medical team around little Alex. It's hard to see now, but we know that "all [not some] things work together for good for those that love the Lord ... " ...Hang in there and know there are so many hanging with you ... give little Alex a pat on the head from the two of us

genell said...

Dear Nicole,
you have every right to have a melt down. being strong is just a word people use that haven't been there. they say god send angels when you need them the most. maybe yours was carrying a lap top.
love genell

Anonymous said...

Hey...Sorry to hear about your morning glad Cat was there to help you through :)

Thinking of you always,

Lauren,Uly,Alexis and Isaac!

Anonymous said...

Good Morning,
I just wanted to let you know that I am going through my morning routine and checking the blog. Hang in there guys , and know that everyone, is thinking of you guys and praying for you. You never realize how strong you are, until you have to be.
We love you ,

Anonymous said...

praying for you guys today!


Anonymous said...

Hugs and smiles and prayers.

Anonymous said...

Thank God for friends like Cat! What a blessing.

Amanda Smith